Drunk Girl Theater
My first theater experience was when I was when I was in my early 30’s. Growing up in a small town 20 miles south of downtown Pittsburgh, my parents never brought us into the city and certainly never to the theater. Now that I am a parent, I want my children to experience all that they can.
Since his freshman year, Vampire Boy has been involved with theater arts as part of the lighting or stage crew. In May 2011, our high school’s spring musical production was The Wizard of Oz (I went to see it twice). Once the advertisements started in May for the Wicked production and it’s performances in Pittsburgh, I knew I wanted to buy tickets for the three of us to go to a performance. With my tight budget, I decided to get the least inexpensive tickets with the rationale that there isn’t a bad seat in the Benedum. I also learned the lesson that one goes directly to the box office to buy tickets rather than online ($27 in convenience fees? ouch!).
Finally, September rolls around. I think I am more excited to see the show than the children are (and I gave up going to see one of my favorite Rock Boat bands, Ingram Hill!). We spend a week figuring out the logistics of how we’re all getting into town for the evening. We determine (and agree) on a place for dinner. I leave work early on show day and drive home to pick them up so we can drive back into town. We have a great dinner at Wingharts Burger & Whiskey Bar (yeah, I didn’t realize it was that small of a place but the burgers? YUM!).
After dinner, we head over to the Benedum to get settled into our seats which are at the top of the Benedum. The lights go down, the curtain goes up. The kids and I enjoy the first half of the performance. We’ve been sitting in our seats for about two hours, so at intermission, we get up to stretch our legs in the hall behind our seats. We’re standing there for about 5 minutes before it happens. All of a sudden, a young(er) woman (I’m horrible with ages but guessing in her late 20’s) FALLS from the top step into the hallway. Her friend, who was walking up the stairs behind her, then shoves her, causing her to face plant into the carpeting. Social Diva notices Vampire Boy and I looking over, so she turns around to see what we were looking at. Both kids then look at me like “What the hell?” This woman was so sloppy, shitfaced drunk that she could barely pick herself up from the floor. She was stumbling around not sure where to go. Escorts immediately came to her side and guided her from the stairs to the elevators. Intermission show over, we head back to our seats and enjoy the second half of the performance.
I can’t help but wonder who the hell gets so shitfaced drunk before going to the theater on a Tuesday night? What kind of friend even allows you to go to the theater that drunk? What kind of friend then pushes you out of her way instead of helping you up? This behavior is the norm on the South Side, but certainly not in the Cultural District.
At the end of the night, the kids and I spent a great evening together. I love sharing these experiences with them. We had a nice dinner, saw an excellent performance, and had the added bonus lesson of how NOT to behave.