Monthly Archives: April 2013

College Visit!

Holy crap!

If you’re a frequent visitor, you might know that Vampire Boy is a senior in high school. He is interested in continuing his education and has been working with his dad on college applications. Dad had a good idea — let him apply to colleges within a reasonable driving distance, see where he gets accepted, and then visit those campuses for him to decide where he wants to go.

We had our first college visit this past weekend! As a family unit!

Some background: Dad and I separated in March 2001 with our divorce being final in February 2006 (finally!). It was not a pretty separation thanks to child support issues. Things have been decent on and off over the past five years and I like that we finally seem to be able to have a decent divorced relationship.

Dad and Vampire Boy worked on applications and acceptances started coming in. OK, time to look at the Open House schedules and plan a campus visit.  Dad invited me to come along (I had planned on going whether I was invited or not and driving myself if I had to!) and offered for me to ride along with them. Other than the hours we spent sitting on separate sides of the Family Division waiting room, it would be the first time we spent such a substantial part of the day together with the kids.

First visit was this past weekend. Dad picked us up at 6:45 AM for our hour drive. I was worried things would be a little weird, but we got along just fine. We talked and joked around in the car as I presume a ‘normal’ family would. We sat as a family in each of the informational sessions. We went on a campus tour. We checked out the residence halls. We visited the Science building and spoke to one of the chemistry faculty. At one point, we both leaned around from our auditorium seats to look at Vampire Boy when they were explaining that all communication is sent to his University mailbox — his ID was included in his acceptance letter — a mailbox he NEVER looked at! (This makes more sense when I explain that we went to his Open House blindly. He had registered, but did not receive any email or postal mail confirmation of his attendance, and I didn’t think about it until he received a packet from another school confirming his attendance.)

We all loved the campus. We liked the fact that it’s a smaller campus within a reasonable driving distance. We liked the chemistry department and faculty. We liked the student to teacher ratio within the chemistry department (his interest for now). He came away from this Open House knowing that this is where he wants to go to school. I’m trying to encourage him to visit at least one more, but  the next Open House is at a larger campus and he is adamant he likes the smaller campus. I don’t think I’m going to win the battle to get him to look any other campuses. I’m ok with that since I did the same exact thing when visiting business schools for myself many (many, many) years ago.

Holy shit, my ‘baby’ is looking forward to going off to college in the Fall.

New Science Hall

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Are You With The Right Partner?

This seems to be making the rounds on Facebook and I’m saving it here so I can come back and re-read as needed.

Are you with the right partner?

Are you with the right partner?

ARE YOU WITH THE RIGHT PARTNER?

During a seminar, a woman asked,” How do I know if I am with the right person?”

The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, “It depends. Is that your partner?” In all seriousness, she answered “How do you know?” Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it’s weighing on your mind
replied the author.

Here’s the answer.

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn’t hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn’t have to DO anything. That’s why it’s called “falling” in love.

People in love sometimes say, “I was swept of my feet.”Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It’s a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, “Am I with the right person?” And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this):

The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.

Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a “decision”. Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO! ♥

[NOTE:  The author/speaker is not identified in the FB posts, therefore, I cannot provide the appropriate citation for them.]

Money Mash Up 4/8

Money Mash Up 4/8.  Hosted by simply stacia.  A weekly series dedicated to keeping us on track with our spending, giving, and  goal setting during the week and learning to find low cost and/or “free” things to do in our spare time.  Details below if you’d like to use on your blog

1.  The most money I’ve spent last week was for my summer pool pass for me and Social Diva for $122.40. My local municipal pool offers a 20% discount for passes purchased in the month of March. This expense covers the majority of my weekend entertainment on the sunny days.

2.  A low-cost or free thing I did this past week was to meet my friends out for a few drinks on Saturday night. An order of fries and three adult beverages only cost me $16 with a generous tip. It’s been a while since I’ve had a nice night out with friends and this was definitely needed!

3.  The one thing I did for another was pack up at least 5 bags of clothes to donate to the VA Vets Association. I have another bag going to my sister for her kids and step-kids.

4.  One goal that I have and will do this week is to get seeds planted for tomato plants and flowers. I usually spend $100 or so for flowers and tomato plants and then the deer end up eating them. Now that it’s again the law for the neighbor to feed the deer, I’m hoping my plants will have a chance!

5.  What is your favorite city in the United States? Sadly, I haven’t visited too many US cities. I love Hilton Head for vacation. I also recently visited New Orleans, and I’m looking forward to visiting again this November for a conference I’m coordinating. Once Social Diva graduates from high school, I’d love to entertain the thought of moving south.

That’s it for my week. How was yours?

Weird Dream

So Friday morning, just before my alarm is set to go off at 5:45 AM, I’m having a dream (a partial nightmare, actually!).

In this dream, I am out somewhere (I think I was traveling) with my HUSBAND, and my NEWBORN BABY, and I was walking my cat on a leash.

WHAT

THE

HELL?

The husband in the dream was a sports celebrity; not someone I have ever met in person, nor someone I would even care to meet.

I think I am well past the ‘having a baby’ phase of my life. My kids are 18 and 12 which makes me old enough to not really have to worry about having any more kids, plus I believe in birth control to avoid any babies.

The cat is only true thing currently in my day to day life. I have often missed having a dog to walk on these Spring teaser days. I often joke that Batman acts like a dog sometimes. He greets me at the door. He likes to share my dinner. He sleeps tucked against my legs. But I highly doubt that he would allow me to walk him on a leash.

Doing my own dream interpretation, I had applied for a part-time job Thursday evening. I had read @UncleCrappy’s post about someone who had a baby earlier in the week. And I’m guessing Batman was probably snuggling me as he typically does close to alarm time.

Hopefully, the events of the prior day is what prompted that type of dream so close to alarm time!